


The Only Presidential Candidate Who Is Literally Cash Money

by ashilrak



Series: 177(6) [23]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-27
Updated: 2016-06-27
Packaged: 2018-07-18 11:46:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7314010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashilrak/pseuds/ashilrak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adotfightme: and hey guys, if all else fails and trump wins, we can just have another revolution</p><p>Jdotlaw: yeah bOI</p><p>Gwar: NO NO NO NO NO NO</p><p>Morelikedamnilton: alexANDER</p><p>Gwar: NO</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Only Presidential Candidate Who Is Literally Cash Money

**Author's Note:**

> Reincarnation is normal in this verse
> 
> John Laurens = Jonathan Lawrence = Jdotlaw  
> Hercules Mulligan = Hercules Mueller = Tailorsoldierspy  
> Lafayette = Paul Motier = Lagayette  
> James Madison = James Mercury = Mamjer  
> Aaron Burr = Aaron Alston = Colderthancold  
> Angelica Schuyler = Angel Skylar = Angelsky  
> Elizabeth "Eliza" Hamilton nee Schuyler = Elizabeth "Lizzie" Skylar = Morelikedamnilton  
> Maria Reynolds = Maria Nelson = NelsonMa  
> Theodosia Prevost Burr = Theodora "Dori" Bercer = DoriBer  
> Alexander Hamilton = Alexander Miller = Adotfightme  
> Thomas Jefferson = Thomas Jemmings = Tomjemmings  
> George Washington = George Warner = Gwar

**Gwar:** So

 **Adotfightme:** GEORGE WASHINGTON IS RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT

 **Gwar:** George Warner is running for president

 **Angelsky:** when was this decided

 **Gwar:** Yesterday

 **Lagayette:** we asked him about it a couple of days ago, but we weren’t being entirely serious

 **Adotfightme:** but now he has to

 **Colderthancold:** he doesn’t have to do anything ?

 **Gwar:** Well, I kind of announced it at the debate, and also America needs to be fixed

 **Colderthancold:** Sir, it would be very simple to write that off

 **Adotfightme:** but why would he fuckign want to

 **Colderthancold:** maybe because he didn’t really want to be president in the first place?

 **Jdotlaw:** Well, u kno what burr, somebody’s gotta fix this country and it sure as hell won’t be trump

 **Morelikedamnilton:** but isn’t he not allowed to? Because he already served two terms? And also, isn’t you know, too late to run in this upcoming election

 **Gwar:** Burr, I stand by my word. If i said I’m running for president, I’m running for president. And I, personally, actually have no experience in any sort of political office. George Washington did. And I am too late for the official party nomination, but I can enter the debate as an independent. Besides, do you really think I’d side with a party?

 **Angelsky:** man has a point

 **Gwar:** And, as Alex pointed out, yes the election might be in a month, but there are very few people who fully support the candidate they’re planning on voting for - it’s more of a lesser of two evils. All I have to do is say I was George Washington, and much of the trouble in that regard is gone.

 **Mamjer:** Sir, how on earth are you going to publicize yourself quickly enough to have any chance. Even as a verified historical figure reincarnate, you’d still have to gain the attention of the media.

 **Adotfightme:** AND THAT IS WHERE I COME IN

 **Tomjemmings:** stop whatever it is that you’re about to say because I’m sure I do not want to hear it

 **Adotfightme:** lol, but yeah, I’m not gonna do that

 **Adotfightme:** basically, imma get a historically verified twitter (bc that’s a thing?) and just start fighting the GOP and trump and really everyone with a twitter, and it shouldn’t take very long until I grab someone’s attention

 **Nelsonma:** can u limit urself to 140 characters tho

 **Adotfightme:** that’s what multiple tweets are for, my dear maria

 **Adotfightme:** but yeah, after that, the rest of us will start trickling in, and the media will have their “omg the founding fathers r reincarnating fuckign finally” crisis

 **Adotfightme:** and then we’ll be like, ayyy, look who we are now

 **Adotfightme:** and boom gwar will announce his candidacy and his campaign will be smooth bc he’s george washington

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** i’m already planning the photoshoots tbh

 **Tomjemmings:** why are the rest of us involved in this

 **Adotfightme:** bc thomas, as much as I hate to say it, people kno ur name, and u did have some effect on this country

 **Mamjer:** so did the rest of us

 **Lagayette:** and then as even those that are less familiar (moi) they’ll see that there are a lot of us

 **Doriber:** this makes me uncomfortable bc it might work

 **Gwar:** Alex will be my speechwriter/campaign manager

 **Morelikedamnilton:** are u seriously planning on making him M O R E stressed

 **Gwar:** Do you really think Alex would let anyone else take those positions

 **Morelikedamnilton:** . . .

 **Angelsky:** and I mean, worst comes to worst, people will vote for us cuz we’re all hot

 **Colderthancold:** us?

 **Angelsky:** do you really think we’re not going to be involved

 **Tomjemmings: @gwar** Sir, what are your plans for if you actually win

 **Adotfightme:** WHEN he actually wins

 **Nelsonma:** i feel like we should focus more on what’s happening now tho

 **Doriber:** Yeah, how exactly will this work?

 **Gwar:** Well, that’s what you’re all here for.

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** Doesn’t it cost serious bank to run for president

 **Angelsky:** ur trusting a bunch of college kids to run ur first political campaign L O L

 **Morelikedamnilton:** we need a slogan

 **Adotfightme:** “it’s motherfucking george washington what more do you need”

 **Nelsonma:** “the dude who invented being president”

 **Jdotlaw:** “the only presidential candidate who is literally cash money”

 **Lagayette:** “America’s Dad”(dy)

 **Gwar:** I’m starting to regret this decision

 **Colderthancold:** Sir, won’t you have to step away from your classes and coach position

 **Gwar:** Yes, I will. I have plenty of vacation days saved up for the campaign process, though the first part of that will not require me to really be doing anything in person

 **Tomjemmings:** Uh, sir, who’s going to be your vice president?

 **Nelsonma:** alright u can totally roast me for this, but how funny would it be if u got george-io to do it

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** george squared

 **Gwar:** ABSOLUTELY NOT

 **Colderthancold:** Is John Adams around here somewhere

 **Adotfightme:** N O

 **Tomjemmings:** this might be the only time i agree with hamilton, but let’s avoid Adams, please

 **Gwar:** I haven’t thought that far ahead

 **Morelikedamnilton:** Are you saying that you’re going to let us run your campaign on the basis that you were George Washington, and then figure the rest out later

 **Nelsonma:** aren’t you supposed to be experienced in this sort of thing

 **Gwar:** That’s what you might think, but believe it or not, I was focused more on setting a precedent of not being a complete failure, and everything else was a result of that goal

 **Adotfightme:** I did most of the work, not gonna lie

 **Tomjemmings:** you did not do most of the work

 **Adotfightme:** oh, really now

 **Mamjer:** Let’s not get into this

 **Doriber:** How do you get a historically verified twitter account anyways?

 **Adotfightme:** You essentially get historians to back you up and submit the formal request to twitter

 **Jdotlaw:** huh, how far are you in that process

 **Adotfightme:** did u kno that **@gwar** counts as a historian

 **Morelikedamnilton:** are you kidding me

 **Adotfightme:** N O P E

 **Colderthancold:** you’ve already written and submitted the formal request haven’t you

 **Adotfightme:** Y E P

 **Gwar:** Why is this the first I’m hearing of it

 **Adotfightme:** I mean, I’m telling you right now. And since you’re the only one submitting the request, you might get a call.

 **Nelsonma:** Okay, but doesn’t that make it really easy for everyone to go around claiming they’re, i don’t know, one of you guys or like mlk or something

 **Adotfightme:** They check the national register too, and the reason they have historians submit the claims is because ideally it’s someone who is an expert and would be able to figure out pretty quickly who’s lying, but beyond that, yeah - there’s not that much to prove it

 **Colderthancold:** so how are you going to make that work

 **Adotfightme:** imma fight everyone, but imma do it adotham style

 **Lagayette:** what does that mean

 **Adotfightme:** like i’m going to go back to me 18th century writing style

 **Jdotlaw:** how can you do that? I’ve read your writings now, and yes, they’re exceptionally well-written, but definitely more...modern

 **Adotfightme:** That’s because I started writing from scratch in this life, but I remember how to write from before

 **Angelsky:** huh

 **Morelikedamnilton:** if ur ever bored, please feel free to write me some of those letters, i do miss them

 **Adotfightme:** ;)

 **Tomjemmings:** Wait, so you’re relying on the fact that people will believe you’re you because anyone who can write essays insulting people couldn’t be anyone else

 **Adotfightme:** basically

 **Mamjer:** You’re not that well-known tho

 **Adotfightme:** Which is part of the reason getting the account will be easier, but don’t underestimate my ability to write in order to get noticed

 **Gwar:** If it doesn’t work, it just means I’m not really running, which is fine

 **Jdotlaw:** No, sir, you’re going to be president

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** and we’re gonna milk the whole gwash thing so hard, i have so many outfits planned omg

 **Lagayette:** What’s my role going to be

 **Adotfightme:** u get to be the first lady

 **Colderthancold:** THAT IS ANOTHER THING

 **Mamjer:** ???

 **Colderthancold:** Sir, I mean no offense, but while you might have the whole george washington thing, you’re also a black, single man who might not be straight, you have no political experience, you’ve been in academia your entire life, and you don’t have a political party

 **Nelsonma:** Okay, yes, but he was also a white plantation owner, it is actually illegal for anyone to outrank him in the military, and he’s got mad bank - and there are going to be a lot of people willing to vote for anyone who’s not trump or clinton

 **Angelsky:** The whole thing’s a little shady, but it’s fine

 **Adotfightme:** Yep

 **Morelikedamnilton:** So what slogan are we going with

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** Yeah, that would be neat to know, I’ll take care of the campaign designs and stuff

 **Tomjemmings:** we need professionals, this is going to fail

 **Nelsonma:** literally three people in this group chat have ran for president (not counting gwash, bc he was asked to step into the position) and of those three two of them have won. @tomjemmings ur one of those people, YOU ARE THE PROFESSIONAL IN THIS SITUATION

 **Mamjer:** it’s a little different now

 **Gwar:** So, i’ve been grading recent quizzes during the conversation

 **Doriber:** Aren’t you not supposed to discuss school stuff like that with us?

 **Gwar:** See, but I’m curious, **@mamjer,** how did you possibly fail the bill of rights quiz

 **Mamjer:** I did not

 **Gwar:** It is right in front of me

 **Adotfightme:** YOU FAILED THE BILL OF RIGHTS QUIZ that is P R I C E L E S S

 **Tomjemmings:** okay, but seriously **@mamjer,** how the fuck

 **Gwar:** Language **@tomjemmingss**

 **Mamjer:** I don’t want to talk about it. I was tired, okay.

 **Tomjemmings: @gwar** sir, are we going to be your cabinet again ?

 **Jdotlaw:** is that even legal

 **Adotfightme:** there are like twenty people now so we’d be a grand 10% if both jefferson and i managed to get approved

 **Angelsky:** but isn’t there like, you know, an age minimum

 **Adotfightme:** It’s 35 to be president or vice president, 30 for senator, and 25 for state representative. Most states have an elected office minimum age of either 18 or 21. But cabinet positions are appointed, so no, not really

 **Morelikedamnilton:** you guys would have to drop out of school probably

 **Adotfightme:** e h

 **Jdotlaw:** wouldn’t you lose your visa if you’re not a student

 **Tomjemmings:** ur not officially a citizen omg you can’t do it then

 **Adotfightme:** I’ve done it before, I can do it again

 **Gwar:** I am going to be the least qualified candidate

 **Adotfightme:** but ur still gonna win

 **Colderthancold:** that’s terrifying

 **Gwar: @colderthancold** You get to talk to the press, because you have a talent for talking and saying absolutely nothing

 **Colderthancold:** I would say thank you, but that’s not necessarily a compliment

 **Gwar:** :-)

 **Nelsonma:** omg

 **Doriber:** wait, are we all going to be involved in this

 **Adotfightme:** Yes

 **Morelikedamnilton:** alex bby, how r u gonna explain maria

 **Adotfightme:** I

 **Nelsonma:** that’s awkward

 **Adotfightme:** it’ll be fine

 **Adotfightme:** I’ll write another pamphlet or something

 **Morelikedamnilton:** how

 **Morelikedmanilton:** about

 **Morelikedamnilton:** no

 **Adotfightme:** We’ll burn that bridge when we get to it

 **Lagayette:** english might not be my first language but I don’t think that’s how that goes

 **Jdotlaw:** but it describes his life so well

 **Adotfightme:** aren’t you supposed to love me

 **Gwar:** this is the child I am having run my campaign

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** Guys, do u want new outfits for halloween

 **Nelsonma: @tailorsoldierspy** herc my man I’ll take literally any reason to get a new dress

 **Angelsky:** SAME

 **Doriber:** :-)

 **Tomjemmings:** we have like a month to think about this

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** it will take me that long to make these, they are HANDMADE

 **Adotfightme:** COUTURE

 **Lagayette:** I approve

 **Jdotlaw:** everyone pick up ur nearest beverage cuz we’re gonna have a toast to america

 **Angelsky:** America

 **Lagayette:** Amérique

 **Adotfightme:** A M E R I C A

 **Tomjemmings:** I just got a vv weird look

 **Nelsonma:** did u say it out loud

 **Tailorsoldierspy:** are u saying u didn’t

 **Adotfightme:** and hey guys, if all else fails and trump wins, we can just have another revolution

 **Jdotlaw:** yeah bOI

 **Gwar:** NO NO NO NO NO NO

 **Morelikedamnilton:** alexANDER

 **Gwar:** NO

**Author's Note:**

> So, in the original outline I had the next segment would have been about thanksgiving, but since I added in the whole gwash for prez thing, that's gonna take up the next couple segments - so if that's what your into, buckle your seat belts :)
> 
> Also, if you noticed the references to "George Washington Is Cash Money" by Cory O'Brien, you get a high five
> 
> 177(6) Verse News:  
> \-----I'm officially that loser who fanarts for her own fic, so here, have a [gwash doodle](http://kookookarli.tumblr.com/post/146520190695/so-i-fanarted-for-my-own-fic-its-fine-read-it)  
> \-----I accept ideas and prompts and whatnot, especially bc I'm planning a drabble/outtake fic for this verse
> 
> Me News:  
> \-----I'm debating whether or not to change my icon and stuff, bc I feel like I should  
> \-----I am so stressed in general, I am so sorry I use this section to complain about my life, i work an office job. U G H  
> \-----I really am excited by the fact that I can apparently write rap? Please message me with challenges so I can write more <3
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! I really hope you enjoyed it! I'm sure you guys all know I love comments at this point, haha :-)
> 
> <3 <3 <3 <3 <3


End file.
